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JuicyFruit

Junky To Funky
 

OUT OF OFFICE!!!

Sorry oh handsome and beautiful people of Urb. The Juice is overwhelmed in work and life. Goatfist has me by my juicyfruits and I am under the squeeezah. Be back in a month!
HUGZ
Juicyfruit, Esq.

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I made it on the top twelve Boom Box scores...all my efforts and ignoring friends and family has paid off!! O____o
man...I gotta problem LOL
Yeeeehaawwww!!!

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PROM WAS AWESOME!!

Yea. MilkNKittens...can show a Urbette a great time... my dogs are killing me :D and so are my arms from HUGZing him and so are my ... well LOL

Okay between work, UrbOlympics and trying to get packed to go on vacation... I can't return props...so don't prop me if you want to be propped back. Seriously, I do not want to hurt anyones feelings...The Juice...is being squeezed O__X I can't take it...so please, unless ya just wanna give me props for LOVE...forget about it! lol
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BUT...am doing my gig for UrbOlympics..not to be confused with the UniqueOlympics O___o (whach that pc stuff) so may not be able to get to your battle...and then off for vacation (2 weeks!).. Adios Amigos! Ciao Amichi! Sayonara tomodachi (is that right? LOL)
HUGZ*
Juicy


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Here I am and all dressed up to go to the...PROM *grinz...squeals...gushes!! O___o!!*

And whose taking da Juice to the Prom?!?! KitKat - MilknKittens. So I put on this dress. Where are all the tiaras and the pairs of stiletto pumps in the shops? Regardless of the lack of PROM gear in the shops... I must admit...I am SO hot and stunningly gorgeous...the power of my beauty frightens even me *speechless* O__o! Perhaps I should not shave so that the other girls might have a chance with their dates... lol...

I have little Groovette as our chaperone just in case Kitkat thinks he can get his milky paws all over me *wink* lol.

Let's dance handsome!! First, let's ditch our lil chaperone *shoves Groovette down the pole*

*bats her eyes at MilknKittens* I know what you're thinking Kitkat... Do they have angels in Urboland? "whispers in Kit's ear* "Yes, they do handsome, yes they dooooo..."
*giggles*

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Tunsa!! What's that smell?...Fresh Irish Springs? No... Dove Soap? ...no...Goatfist Girlie Soap? ...no... Mayor MuskOx Power Soap O__o (nothing like muskox to freshin up a room)... it's must be some of that new UrboUrbanFresh Tunsa Soap :D *takes a long whifff* aaaaaahh
He bathed!! Juiced and oiled up? LOL Man, you are a bag full of fun :D
*grabs back brush* let Juicy scrape the barnacles off your backside ...LOL O___o seriously kiddies...that's a tough job. Not for the easily squeamish or is that screamish...either way

To Groinstomp or one who stomps groins ... I love your list of why one would be dissed *giggles* you are such a cute cuddley thang hahahah. Good to see you are still on handsome *HUGZ and pecks*

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Okay, I have been readings peep's lairs about other Urbobs and Urbetties asking to sell or by their stuff..

So I guess I should write something too :D

....NO asking for my body parts (although they are SOOOO nice! Just look at this gorgeous face!! Most beautiful girlie face on the site :D). Not selling anything, giving away anything etc. Sooo...on with my stuff message...

Hmmm..then I guess I need a threatening message... Here it goes:

If you ask me.. I will.. (hmm..something painful and yet visually stimulating)...okay yea..I will impale you on my pole here :D Gee..that's gonna kind of sting but it will look good with all the purple and red lava lamps swirling around your bootie O____o... Then, everyone else can take a turn smacking ya dead carcass around the pole like a tether ball.. then I can get close with my pants of flame and as you slowly turn on the pole grill (x__O) we can cut off your flesh for some gyros...mmm!!! sounds good, NO?!?!? O____o lol

Ya...I dont wanna sell my stuff, but I could go for a gyro :D

Juicy dream journal no. 405044545

JUICYFRUIT

This tells it all and said by one of the most fabu Urbette on this planet Affy!! (Afro_chic) (of course she is lying lol...I got a BIG SECRET about her ... so I forced her to write this! lol):

Equipped with a spirit so loving and free
So beautiful, so kind, so...JUICY!
Struttin' her way through Urbanville
Bringin' the fun makin' sure all receive their fill
Of her sweet, hilarious universe
Always laughing, helping, never terse
Livenin' up battles being a wild chick
Although her dispo. reads Vig, she's a true Beatnik!
Comin' from a Chica so chic, Juicy is definitely hip
From her funky battle convos to her tantalizin' gossip
A true blessing to the town and all who meet this dope Mama
She's ready to love, to support, but don't bring her no drama!

(psst! And you thought me purchasing your tracks was the surprise!)

*giggles*

Love ya Juicy!!!

(wipes a tear from her eyes..) she gets me everytime!)

My Bio -

I was born on the planet - Wriggley Chewing Gum Factory. I had many friends including Doublemint and Spearmint....but my best friends were BlackJack and Big Red...

NO... that is ridiculous!...

A stork brought me to my mama : ) AND there was much rejoicing as I am such a handsome GIRL with a FABU personality *_* Ah, the juicyfruit, ... is such a complicated.. yet beautiful thing! hehe

EXTRA STUFF about lil me:
1. No drama - except when my legs were stolen.. and was trying to win in the 2007 Yearbook as the Drama Queen :D
2. No begging - only my man gets to do that
(I love the DevilDog!)
3. I love to joke around and tease.
4. Don't ask me my age...chicks hate that!
5. I Love Jewel.
6. I love JackMove_Sucka.
7. I love all my homeys!!! Special thanks to:

simbob and manutd (my URB hubby lol) (the most wickedly funny smackers during battle!), Affy (or Ms. Chic), Flaming_Hair_Jim... that man makes me purr.. he's got flaming fabu hair!! O_O lol, BigBadSista (or Cleopatra Jones! watch out!), CatCougar (the things we've gotten ourselves into hehe), DaBest (Big Dog! Woof!), Dark Ang3L (Darkness XO), Da_Preacher, Isomaniac, Jackmove_Sucka (whose da baddest, whose da prettiest!!), Jewel, cap10wow (awesome lyricists hehe), crazy_azn_(name toooo long hehe), diddoe (or Super Shaft! can you dig it?), flaming_goatee (resident philosopher, awesome pic), goofyspouse (supernice spouse), Korune (lil awesome vamp!), Lilly_Larva (Ms. Lill - the sweetest villain I know), Love_Child (can you feel it?), messy_angel (or freaky angel boy), OGRE (the gore stomper!), RUSHBOY (or rushgrim reapermeeper), rackman (or peck flexin - shirt rippin bad boy! - my favorite E-ticket ride :D), Serpent, SycO_Oness (or I wanna, wanna lol), sexymom...too long lol), Sir_Rabbit & Dork (yes Dork hehe), Soul_Corruptor (he's got a billion props yo!!!), Superfunk_Chick, Tiger_Eyes, Zoomer_McTraveller (or 5th wheeler or the TANK), Mad_coco or Madness, that squirmy villainous Maggot (Maggz - the cutest lil grub I know - who although not on Urb, will always be with me in my juicyfruit and HIS avatar, that he made me, on my lair), Great White Hope! (Hope Handsome), Washer(the Wonder) Woman, BlondieXO, lil T!, Ash, Darkness!!! KISSS!! O_O XO, Muckquaiker (mmm..musky man you), GoldGym (Mr. Bicep), summerzzza!!, barkeep (Baileys and coffee plz), xrobertx (and sassy sally shades (HUGS) :P lol), sexy Sacred _Apple (hehe), SADISTIC (only place where sadistic is loved!, unless you know, you are a little O.o lol), HANDOFDOOM (dont want to list last 3 numbers...jinx my site!), Cangurina (okay I hug you first! hehe), glowstik, DZhelasi (DZ..she's dating someone I called an old fart! LOL.. he's got a bazillion props yo!), Richmax (my "all things look very good down under" man! lol), Dark_Ranger (my dancing honey), Zeebert (my naturalist naked booty beasty boy), kramer15 (he had 82 million urbs yo - pss Bill Gates is playing here! lol), INVERTED CRUCIFIX (or XIFICURC), Tefex, Dersarend (daddy!), Skryker, Zerowun *slap*, Johnny Alpha (Disco Ballz or Alpha Man lol), Super Freaky D, Kingsland, __kingz___, Elanore666, Muckquaiker (MtnMuck), elrey2_jkl, Die_or_eat_italian (italiana bella), LILQ08, rockstar98, plumperman, urb_god (my favorite HUGGLES) and __SuperSmasher__ ( my Face Crew King), brian Boooyaaah 21 and GroinStomp (sneaky groin lol) and I can't list everyone but you know I love ya all and ...THANK YOU for all the props, hillarious conversations, pizzas, TPS, funk and love and for listening to my yackity yack yack. (If you don't see your name on here and you KNOW and LOVE me... let me know and I will add it on).

8. to me all the XY's are handsome, cute thang, etc. and the XX's are beautiful..whether on Urbania or some other planet in the galaxy: Now that you know that, don't let it go to your head! lol There is nothing more beautiful than a humble XX or XY.

9. I'm really a beatnik, but I want to battle with my homies in assaults soo......

10. THank you to Mayor_DaMan and everyone who has made Urbaniacs an awesome, funky and cool place to be...

now enough about me...

no not yet lol
Yea!! I got hit by the beatnik Mafia..and it's the kind of beatin I like! lol: Submitted by her coolness and loveliness... Love_Child: After this prose comes the reason why Lovely wrote it:

From her toes to her neck, she's quite a vixen,
But get to her head, and "Woah, what's wit the mixin'!?"
She says she's a vigi, but that makes us all cringe,
'Cause we all know the truth, she a LUNATIC FRINGE!
She comes off sweet and funny... even hilarious,
But let down your guard and the situation becomes precarious
What she wants is gossip; for your secrets she's in hot pursuit,
Yeah, she's that notorious columnist we know as JuicyFruit!

AWARDZ!!!

AWARD #9 goes to grallmaster for:

GIVING THE GOOD NEWS about the Urborang..for keeping me on top of the rang situation, for being my O_O's and ears on the ground and threads. You get the official EAGLE EYE & SNOOP DOG award!!! and for saying I am the coolest and cutest girl on the site O___o (seriously flattery will get you everything) you get the CUTE LIL O BROWN NOSE AWARD lol ...seriously thanks for being soooo sweeet mastaaaa!!
*HUGS*
Juicy

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AWARD #8 goes to Kaniswind...um for asking for an award LOL... Oh wait...for being able to save urboz during a bad recession. Kanis gets the URBO ANTI-RECESSION AWARD Congrats Kanis enjoy all the hardwork of saving urboz :D *claps and hugs*

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AWARD #7 goes to Elaphante for the: What else...BOB SAGET Award *gag* Who knew that Bob Saget could actually be so funny (when spoken of O___o)...here are Elaphante's recent rantings :

BOB SAGET.Bob SAGET.BBOOBB SSAAGGEETT.Sorry I just can't stop saying that.LOL

Seriously we had a battle last night (3 on 4?) TunsaTheEgo, Super_Flyyswatter, MilknCheese (Kittens), max_and a bunch of numbers (25277 all the urboz Max has ever had :P), Trunkness (elaphante) and RangeRover (I am sorry if you own one..shop material lol). Bob Saget and Tunsa's Olsen Twinz were the entire topic...especially the sound of S_A_Get. But poor Elaphante was going a little nutty with it lol. But made the entire battle pretty freakishly funny. I should open the Bob Saget Addiction clinic :D
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AWARD #5&6 goes to ME: Tada!!!

All hail the Queen of Humour! It's the Juice! And she's LOOSE! Hahaha! Congrats on getting Most Humorous in the yearbook. ^_^ (from Love_Child)..well that makes it official, there are no funny people on this site anymore heehee; wait wait one more for MEEEE! and that is..

I forgot to say... All Hail the Queen of Vigilantes!! You really do embody the vigilantic spirit, I must say. Rebellious, rules be darned, caution to the wind... and crazy! Haha! (again from Love) REBELLIOUS..okay my hubby the Devildog would agree, but hey every good boy loves a bad girl O___o (that sounds even crazy me saying cuz I am such a GOOD girl *grinz and halo pops on head* lol

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AWARD #4: Goes to GO_COMPARE for NERVY ENTITLEMENT AWARD. Here was his/her request:

im new so can u giv me stuff

The answer is of course, NO...seriously, we all worked for our stuff... so should you... DONT ASK ME to sell my body or give you stuff.
Thanks!
Juicyfruit, Esq.
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AWARD #3: Goes to MilknKittens for the WHAT TO DO IN A BAD SITUATION AWARD. THere we were, facing down a Sparky and Kelvin with his bird covered poopey hands. In a couple of hits Kelvin was down...bird pO___oP with him. Then Sparky almost has us. Milk pulls out his granny's underwear O___o (I do not know where he got those and I dont want to know LOL...seriously, who thought of THAT item... ya need to get outdoors sometime!!) In a panic but brilliant move, Milkness throws the undies at Sparky.... Sparky naturally freaks (a pair of old granny underwear? I would freak out too).. We then bean him over his pale white head and presto..Urboz and health tps for each of us!! Congrats MilknKitKatness! *HUGS*

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AWARD #2: Goes to mrparty for the DREAMY BOYFRIEND AWARD!!! He remembered his 22nd month of dating...now I dont care where you are in the world, your culture, etc. That's LOVE...sigh *grinz*

Congrats mr..."McLovin"...party!!
*HUGS*
Juicy

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AWARD: TunsaTheGreat gets the FAB Attitude Award - after facing a Kelvin and Sparky with me and Prady (who did a great job too *grinz*)...and what happens??? On the verge of winning the entire battle (like one more hit O___o seriously, it BLEW) ...the undefined monster comes... kills the battle..NO urboz, NO TPs and Tunsa writes me a grammy and let me know that -

TunsaThe Great is grateful that he could:

1. see that battle;
2 be my meatshield; and
3. be part of my battle.

FABULOUS ATTITUDE AWARD ..DING DING!! *HUGS* You're a great homey Tunsa!!!!

PEACE

Let nothing disturb you
Let nothing frighten you
All things pass away;
God never changes.
Patience obtains all things.
He who has God finds he lacks nothing. God alone suffices.

St. Theresa of Avila

(yea even more than tps and gear O___o) lol