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Junky To Funky

The Man, the Myth, the Legend...Dersa

Proud Leader of The Family.

Member of The Black Suit Squadron.

Urbainville's Deputy Mayor.

If you have any questions you'd like answered in the Chronicles, kindly direct them to my Press Secretary, the lovely and talented Summers.

Yes, my Deady Bear is awesome. No, he's not for sale.

The stats on the DM shirt are:
Might- None of your business
Defense- None of your concern
Mojo- No concern of yours
Health- 1
SP- 0

No, my Deady Bear is not for sale.

If you make a really low bid on a trade, and I reject it, making the same bid 15 more times won't make me change my mind. Stop it!

No, my Deady Bear is not for sale.

Yes, I have awesome stats. No, I'm not selling my body parts. I do sell other body parts, though, so check my trades.

NO, my Deady Bear is not for sale! Quit asking already!


Dersa-Mart is open for business again, now with new pricing!

Not currently able to acquire cash gear. Babies are expensive.

If you request body parts, I will find them for you at a cost of 1 tp per 100k that I have to spend. Discount if there's no Might tps included in your offer.

Special request items such as Twin-visibles, again, 1 tp per 100k I have to spend to get it.

Battles, and why you sholdn't tell me to start them

If I have invited three other people to a battle, and you are the first one to show up, you need to keep in mind that I'm waiting for the other people. Tell me to start the battle, and I'll still wait a reasonable amount of time for the other people. The only difference is, when I do start the battle, I'll probably kill you first for being rude and inconsiderate to my friends. Ain't Evil great?

If I'm invited to a battle, and someone in that battle sits there and says "Start! Start! Start!" to the person that invited me to the battle...can you guess? Yeah, I'll kill the annoying one first. Just because I'm evil doesn't mean I like bad manners.

If I invite you to a battle and I have to gram you twice to inform you that it's your turn because you're playing a game, watching TV, talking to your friends, etc., I will never invite you to a battle again and won't show if you call me to a battle. A direct quote from a player who did this "You need to get some patience, man! What, you expect me to hang around for twenty minutes fighting a Sparky?" News flash jackarse, if you actually stay and take your turn when you're supposed to, the battle doesn't take twenty minutes.

Shout outs

Many thanks go to the Urbaniacs that have given me a helping hand and are always willing to help the new guys.

Mayor Da_Man (thanks for this totally rockin site!)

Thanks to Skryker (my wife in all worlds) for introducing me to the site.

Special thanks to Captain_Berlin (the other half of the greatest superhero team ever, lol!) for always coming when I call and always calling me for battles. We'll get Johnny without backup yet.

And thanks to all the friendly people here who make this such a great site to play on. Even the villains are friendly. Weird.

Friends and Foes

My sisters:

My brothers:
(more later)
They say that a good hero needs a good villain. I must be a great hero, because I have the Systers of Sin.

goddess_de_nocturne(best nemesis ever!)
SydneyAlice(currently the unstoppable juggernaut of the Systers)
Elanore_666 (the second sister to come at me)
summers(almost got your number, sis.)
SuperDirty(possessor of a Kryptonite furse)

The person that's still on that I miss the most:
The TP Queen herself, Lilly_Larva(hopefully we can battle together again soon)

People I miss who are no longer active

It was a dark and stormy night...really, it was!

I was doing my normal nightshift job when suddenly, lightning struck my forklift. KAZOWIE!!!!!!!!! Now I was doing 100x the normal speed on the machine, but the steering wheel was fused.

Realizing that the machine was about to hit the wall, without thinking, I jumped off the machine, ran around behind it and disconnected the power. Then I lifted the machine until it stopped moving.

Wait a minute...I don't remember being able to lift a forklift. Or being that fast, either.

I don't think the company's health benefits cover this.

"So, anyway, I was at work last night and I was kind of struck by lightning.

And now I kind of have superpowers and I'm kind of going to start being a masked vigilante.

This is way better than a radioactive spider bite!

Why are you wearing that mask?"

The C and G Connection

So the wife and I moved to Urbanville along with the kid (who has superpowers too-who would have guessed?).

I was out patrolling alone one night (because I still work nights.) when I heard a call for assistance. I, being all superpowery, of course responded. That's when I met Captain_Berlin. We exchanged niceties and then proceeded to shred the bad guys. I have fought alongside many heroes in Urbanville (and a few villains -dark alleys are no place to question help) but in pretty much every battle I've fought, the Captain has been there. And I have been there for many of his battles, in turn. He is by far my staunchest ally.